• bitcoinBitcoin (BTC) $ 51,461.00
  • ethereumEthereum (ETH) $ 2,974.84
  • tetherTether (USDT) $ 0.998955
  • bnbBNB (BNB) $ 380.07
  • solanaSolana (SOL) $ 104.98
  • xrpXRP (XRP) $ 0.543538
  • staked-etherLido Staked Ether (STETH) $ 2,974.49
  • usd-coinUSDC (USDC) $ 0.999380
  • cardanoCardano (ADA) $ 0.595251
  • avalanche-2Avalanche (AVAX) $ 37.23
  • tronTRON (TRX) $ 0.139643
  • dogecoinDogecoin (DOGE) $ 0.084463
  • chainlinkChainlink (LINK) $ 18.57
  • polkadotPolkadot (DOT) $ 7.48
  • matic-networkPolygon (MATIC) $ 0.976075
  • wrapped-bitcoinWrapped Bitcoin (WBTC) $ 51,354.00
  • the-open-networkToncoin (TON) $ 2.09
  • internet-computerInternet Computer (ICP) $ 12.96
  • shiba-inuShiba Inu (SHIB) $ 0.000010
  • uniswapUniswap (UNI) $ 7.39
  • bitcoin-cashBitcoin Cash (BCH) $ 262.22
  • litecoinLitecoin (LTC) $ 69.06
  • daiDai (DAI) $ 0.999288
  • immutable-xImmutable (IMX) $ 3.36
  • bittensorBittensor (TAO) $ 634.23
  • leo-tokenLEO Token (LEO) $ 4.18
  • kaspaKaspa (KAS) $ 0.169719
  • filecoinFilecoin (FIL) $ 7.43
  • cosmosCosmos Hub (ATOM) $ 9.85
  • hedera-hashgraphHedera (HBAR) $ 0.112676
  • blockstackStacks (STX) $ 2.59
  • ethereum-classicEthereum Classic (ETC) $ 25.98
  • optimismOptimism (OP) $ 3.75
  • aptosAptos (APT) $ 9.30
  • nearNEAR Protocol (NEAR) $ 3.23
  • vechainVeChain (VET) $ 0.045647
  • stellarStellar (XLM) $ 0.116226
  • injective-protocolInjective (INJ) $ 34.83
  • okbOKB (OKB) $ 51.22
  • first-digital-usdFirst Digital USD (FDUSD) $ 0.997611
  • celestiaCelestia (TIA) $ 17.44
  • lido-daoLido DAO (LDO) $ 3.09
  • render-tokenRender (RNDR) $ 7.20
  • the-graphThe Graph (GRT) $ 0.280849
  • mantleMantle (MNT) $ 0.770411
  • crypto-com-chainCronos (CRO) $ 0.091538
  • arbitrumArbitrum (ARB) $ 1.85
  • moneroMonero (XMR) $ 122.67
  • sei-networkSei (SEI) $ 0.849368
  • suiSui (SUI) $ 1.69
  • makerMaker (MKR) $ 2,035.99
  • beam-2Beam (BEAM) $ 0.035886
  • rocket-pool-ethRocket Pool ETH (RETH) $ 3,272.29
  • mantle-staked-etherMantle Staked Ether (METH) $ 3,031.02
  • thorchainTHORChain (RUNE) $ 5.16
  • elrond-erd-2MultiversX (EGLD) $ 57.95
  • algorandAlgorand (ALGO) $ 0.190504
  • quant-networkQuant (QNT) $ 104.47
  • bitcoin-svBitcoin SV (BSV) $ 75.80
  • bitget-tokenBitget Token (BGB) $ 1.04
  • ordinalsORDI (ORDI) $ 65.23
  • aaveAave (AAVE) $ 92.39
  • starknetStarknet (STRK) $ 1.86
  • mina-protocolMina Protocol (MINA) $ 1.28
  • flowFlow (FLOW) $ 0.893362
  • heliumHelium (HNT) $ 9.15
  • dydx-chaindYdX (DYDX) $ 3.00
  • true-usdTrueUSD (TUSD) $ 0.971279
  • tokenize-xchangeTokenize Xchange (TKX) $ 15.53
  • theta-tokenTheta Network (THETA) $ 1.23
  • flare-networksFlare (FLR) $ 0.034558
  • havvenSynthetix Network (SNX) $ 3.56
  • chilizChiliz (CHZ) $ 0.130676
  • fetch-aiFetch.ai (FET) $ 1.11
  • fantomFantom (FTM) $ 0.412335
  • worldcoin-wldWorldcoin (WLD) $ 8.52
  • the-sandboxThe Sandbox (SAND) $ 0.493005
  • axie-infinityAxie Infinity (AXS) $ 7.74
  • bittorrentBitTorrent (BTT) $ 0.000001
  • dymensionDymension (DYM) $ 7.11
  • apecoinApeCoin (APE) $ 1.70
  • tezosTezos (XTZ) $ 1.13
  • blurBlur (BLUR) $ 0.710741
  • cheeleeCheelee (CHEEL) $ 18.82
  • whitebitWhiteBIT Coin (WBT) $ 7.02
  • kucoin-sharesKuCoin (KCS) $ 10.46
  • sats-ordinalsSATS (Ordinals) (SATS) $ 0.00000048
  • osmosisOsmosis (OSMO) $ 1.55
  • siacoinSiacoin (SC) $ 0.017127
  • galaGALA (GALA) $ 0.027825
  • roninRonin (RON) $ 3.13
  • akash-networkAkash Network (AKT) $ 4.09
  • astarAstar (ASTR) $ 0.164669
  • frax-etherFrax Ether (FRXETH) $ 2,969.25
  • dydxdYdX (ETHDYDX) $ 3.01
  • conflux-tokenConflux (CFX) $ 0.238768
  • decentralandDecentraland (MANA) $ 0.483460
  • singularitynetSingularityNET (AGIX) $ 0.705277
  • neoNEO (NEO) $ 12.51
  • eosEOS (EOS) $ 0.768895
  • iotaIOTA (IOTA) $ 0.275386
  • arweaveArweave (AR) $ 13.25
  • jasmycoinJasmyCoin (JASMY) $ 0.017774
  • manta-networkManta Network (MANTA) $ 3.36
  • kavaKava (KAVA) $ 0.773421
  • pyth-networkPyth Network (PYTH) $ 0.548752
  • gnosisGnosis (GNO) $ 314.46
  • axelarAxelar (AXL) $ 1.40
  • oasis-networkOasis Network (ROSE) $ 0.119552
  • bonkBonk (BONK) $ 0.000012
  • woo-networkWOO (WOO) $ 0.427016
  • klay-tokenKlaytn (KLAY) $ 0.223054
  • wemix-tokenWEMIX (WEMIX) $ 2.08
  • usddUSDD (USDD) $ 0.998665
  • swethSwell Ethereum (SWETH) $ 3,025.00
  • msolMarinade staked SOL (MSOL) $ 122.99
  • terra-lunaTerra Luna Classic (LUNC) $ 0.000123
  • ethereum-name-serviceEthereum Name Service (ENS) $ 22.18
  • staked-frax-etherStaked Frax Ether (SFRXETH) $ 3,190.05
  • pancakeswap-tokenPancakeSwap (CAKE) $ 2.81
  • frax-shareFrax Share (FXS) $ 8.50
  • fraxFrax (FRAX) $ 0.997166
  • ecasheCash (XEC) $ 0.000033
  • jupiter-exchange-solanaJupiter (JUP) $ 0.478013
  • nexoNEXO (NEXO) $ 1.15
  • gatechain-tokenGate (GT) $ 4.76
  • curve-dao-tokenCurve DAO (CRV) $ 0.553823
  • illuviumIlluvium (ILV) $ 96.73
  • coinbase-wrapped-staked-ethCoinbase Wrapped Staked ETH (CBETH) $ 3,154.80
  • xdce-crowd-saleXDC Network (XDC) $ 0.041330
  • altlayerAltLayer (ALT) $ 0.541111
  • rocket-poolRocket Pool (RPL) $ 27.82
  • iotexIoTeX (IOTX) $ 0.058282
  • ondo-financeOndo (ONDO) $ 0.376344
  • corgiaiCorgiAI (CORGIAI) $ 0.001822
  • zetachainZetaChain (ZETA) $ 2.31
  • trust-wallet-tokenTrust Wallet (TWT) $ 1.29
  • coredaoorgCore (CORE) $ 0.616794
  • 1inch1inch (1INCH) $ 0.446530
  • kujiraKujira (KUJI) $ 4.13
  • tether-goldTether Gold (XAUT) $ 2,028.72
  • pepePepe (PEPE) $ 0.000001
  • radixRadix (XRD) $ 0.047672
  • fasttokenFasttoken (FTN) $ 1.62
  • casper-networkCasper Network (CSPR) $ 0.041189
  • livepeerLivepeer (LPT) $ 15.47
  • lido-staked-solLido Staked SOL (STSOL) $ 122.54
  • superfarmSuperVerse (SUPER) $ 1.06
  • enjincoinEnjin Coin (ENJ) $ 0.333780
  • stepnGMT (GMT) $ 0.265331
  • neutron-3Neutron (NTRN) $ 1.65
  • metis-tokenMetis (METIS) $ 86.65
  • compound-wrapped-btccWBTC (CWBTC) $ 1,033.21
  • nervos-networkNervos Network (CKB) $ 0.010458
  • ocean-protocolOcean Protocol (OCEAN) $ 0.747962
  • skaleSKALE (SKL) $ 0.086548
  • terra-luna-2Terra (LUNA) $ 0.670360
  • apenftAPENFT (NFT) $ 0.00000045
  • aelfaelf (ELF) $ 0.632238
  • gmxGMX (GMX) $ 46.15
  • bitcoin-goldBitcoin Gold (BTG) $ 24.73
  • compound-ethercETH (CETH) $ 59.80
  • ribbon-financeRibbon Finance (RBN) $ 0.470744
  • echelon-primeEchelon Prime (PRIME) $ 12.54
  • kusamaKusama (KSM) $ 46.83
  • pixelsPixels (PIXEL) $ 0.539135
  • mask-networkMask Network (MASK) $ 4.34
  • api3API3 (API3) $ 3.98
  • aleph-zeroAleph Zero (AZERO) $ 1.36
  • holotokenHolo (HOT) $ 0.002313
  • zilliqaZilliqa (ZIL) $ 0.023248
  • zcashZcash (ZEC) $ 27.80
  • compound-governance-tokenCompound (COMP) $ 59.13
  • gasGas (GAS) $ 6.23
  • pax-goldPAX Gold (PAXG) $ 2,000.18
  • ethena-usdeEthena USDe (USDE) $ 1.00
  • pocket-networkPocket Network (POKT) $ 0.244875
  • convex-financeConvex Finance (CVX) $ 4.86
  • desoDecentralized Social (DESO) $ 37.89
  • hytopiaHytopia (TOPIA) $ 0.079191
  • celoCelo (CELO) $ 0.741495
  • strideStride (STRD) $ 4.36
  • basic-attention-tokenBasic Attention (BAT) $ 0.256231
  • stader-ethxStader ETHx (ETHX) $ 3,030.78
  • golemGolem (GLM) $ 0.373353
  • vethor-tokenVeThor (VTHO) $ 0.005064
  • moonbeamMoonbeam (GLMR) $ 0.440898
  • rollbit-coinRollbit Coin (RLB) $ 0.125024
  • xai-blockchainXai (XAI) $ 1.29
  • safepalSafePal (SFP) $ 0.773546
  • dashDash (DASH) $ 30.38
  • qtumQtum (QTUM) $ 3.28
  • oec-tokenOKT Chain (OKT) $ 19.15
  • magicMagic (MAGIC) $ 1.31
  • flokiFLOKI (FLOKI) $ 0.000034
  • helium-mobileHelium Mobile (MOBILE) $ 0.004057
  • nemNEM (XEM) $ 0.037442
  • dogwifcoindogwifhat (WIF) $ 0.331382
  • chromawayChromia (CHR) $ 0.419697
  • origintrailOriginTrail (TRAC) $ 0.856239

ETFs Are Tots Coming, ETFs Are Not Coming, ETFs Are ETFing and 20 Crypto Jokes

0 26

Disclosure: Crypto is a high-risk asset class. This article is provided for informational purposes and does not constitute investment advice. By using this website, you agree to our terms and conditions. We may utilise affiliate links within our content, and receive commission.

This is your weekly digest of top crypto news from Cryptonews.com, followed by a collection of 20 hand-picked crypto jokes.

__________

This week in crypto: unsurprisingly, ETF discussions. While Tuttle Capital Management filed for six new Bitcoin ETFs with the US SEC, two of the issuers released details on the fees that they will charge investors for the ETF, and Glen Goodman argued an ETF is fully priced in, BitGo’s Steve Scott and AJ Nary opined that an ETF approval is unlikely to resolve the bigger regulatory picture in the US anytime soon.

Then, financial services company Matrixport projected a possible rejection of ETF applications in January, followed by co-founder Jihan Wu addressing that ETF report responsible for the market crash.

Meanwhile, Binance warned it may delist 10 prominent privacy cryptocurrencies due to increased regulatory attention, and Huobi Korea announced the shutdown of its services due to a challenging “business environment.”

Meanwhile meanwhile, Visa announced a Web3-based loyalty program for its customers, and the Japanese gaming giant Square Enix reaffirmed its plans to utilize blockchain, AI, and metaverse in creating novel content for consumers. In Kyrgyzstan, the water-rich environment has the potential to provide a necessary boost for the country’s crypto mining industry.

Meanwhile meanwhile meanwhile, India’s digital rupee hit 1 million daily transactions in December, and the ECB published a report detailing the advancements made by the digital euro scheme’s Rulebook Development Group.

In South Korea, Incheon confiscated $375,000 worth of crypto from “tax-evading” residents, and gaming firm WeMade got hit with a $41 million tax bill for its crypto-related activities. Also, Russian tax authorities will start collecting taxes in digital rubles from 2025.

In the we-can’t-play-nice news, hackers exploited Orbit Chain’s cross-chain bridging service for a staggering $82 million, and then they converted their gains into ETH, amassing an additional $1.45 million in unrealized profits. Notably, Match Systems found that the Orbit Chain hackers used the same tactics as those in several other high-profile attacks, suggesting it could be Lazarus.

In confusing news, the man introduced as the HyperVerse CEO appears not to exist.

Let’s laugh at some jokes now.

__________

GM, indeed. Welcome to a brand new year.

GM fellow rapidly repriced unregistered securities speculators pic.twitter.com/CxnvIhYxsp

— Cred (@CryptoCred) August 19, 2023

__

Yes. Use proper terms, please.

Source: jebus911 / Twitter

__

You know you’re here somewhere.

Source: DegenSpartan / Twitter

__

Sure, but that’s like a decade in crypto years. Time in crypto is volatile.

January 1st vs January 3rd pic.twitter.com/p39z28TnGu

— L (@0xLawliette) January 3, 2024

__

Let’s check what the market’s up to.

Every fcking time. $BTC pic.twitter.com/5EZ4CqN1tp

— Blackbeard (@blackbeardXBT) December 30, 2023

__

‘I’m here, beeyashz!”

Everyone who bought crypto in 2023 arriving in 2024 pic.twitter.com/cl9ifG542k

— Gordon (@AltcoinGordon) January 3, 2024

__

Most certainly.

CT after the first #BTC dump of 2024 pic.twitter.com/eBmYTVTP2v

— Devchart 👨🏻‍💻 (@devchart) January 3, 2024

__

What say you, analysts?

when you sell all your ETH to buy SOL at $120pic.twitter.com/S6qVSN3QMI

— LilMoonLambo (@LilMoonLambo) December 27, 2023

__

Very NSFW. Or home. Generally public places. And private spaces.

$ETH https://t.co/U7aOgqzunG pic.twitter.com/eCRtmnzPJP

— krillin ॐ (@LSDinmycoffee) December 27, 2023

__

Lagging a tiny bit.

Source: xamanap / Twitter

__

There’s always a third option.

How about Gary Gensler resign?

— REKTBuildr 🔺🔺🔺 (@rektbuildr) December 26, 2023

__

Like, seriously, IDK, DYOR.

When your friend says “but idk tho DYOR” after shilling you a shitcoin for the last 1.5 hours pic.twitter.com/31tpK9bm7A

— Rhino (@lBattleRhino) October 25, 2023

__

Aaaand, discuss! As loudly as you’d like.

Source: Kicia_Duperelek / Twitter

__

‘What is this sorcery? How do I delay it so it wouldn’t pump?’

Gensler watching crypto pump even despite repeatedly delaying the ETF and calling crypto a scam at every opportunity pic.twitter.com/FKJXItFZWM

— Cred (@CryptoCred) October 26, 2023

__

Dressed for the part.

Solana meme coin investors preparing to turn $7 into $100k pic.twitter.com/u5VQPHgMlx

— Alan Carroll (@alancarroII) December 21, 2023

__

Look, I’m just really curious.

Me reading some CT drama on my feed. pic.twitter.com/76kaqhcsyb

— Devchart 👨🏻‍💻 (@devchart) January 3, 2024

__

Recognising is the first step to understanding that you don’t understand.

when you recognize 3 words from a vitalik tweet pic.twitter.com/4uqtdbMxq1

— CL (@CL207) December 30, 2023

__

Go home.

My portfolio testing support pic.twitter.com/ZuibEo0fNd

— Gordon (@AltcoinGordon) January 3, 2024

__

SMTM, pls.

Tackling 2024 like:
pic.twitter.com/DMPwO1QEHG

— Heart (@heartereum) January 1, 2024

__

And this to you all!

2024 has officially started and the second wave of this bull run with it.

Health, love and massive green candles to everyone! pic.twitter.com/Dmc49N7rQN

— The Crypto Monk (@thecryptomonk) January 1, 2024

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